More Or Less Academic, This Review.Atomic Bomberman is a gumby-fresh and altogether fly version of Hudsonsoft's classic multi-player grenade banquet - a brand new, bells and whistles translation of a game so inherently perfect, you could write a black-and-white, stop-motion, low-res Vic 20 version, then force each participant to play with their feet, and it would still be thumb-gnawingly addictive, cheek-clutchingly exciting, and glans-poppingly amusing. In fact, the programming team would have to try really hard to totally cock it up.They'd have to start thinking things like 'Hmmm... those bomber dudes... let's put 'em on horseback, yeah? And give 'em swords and stuff. And mullet hairdos. And make it so you can, like, cast spells and fly and shit. And hey - let's take all the bombs out too.' Thankfully, they didn't think anything of the sort. Instead they decided to retain all the basics and only fiddle about with the aspects that actually matter the least: namely the graphics and sound effects. Oh yeah, and the number of players. But more on that later.
Regular readers will have clocked last month's preview and playable demo of Atomic Bomberman, so we'll focus on what differentiates this version from the others instead. PC owners have had a crack at the game before in the guise of Dynablaster, but this latest incarnation boasts a few utterly unique features.
Aim away from face
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First things first: the visuals. The anime player-characters have been given an 'American' makeover, modelled in 3D Studio (or equivalent), rendered, animated and turned into sprites. They're far less stumpy than the Japanese originals, and consequently far less cute. Veterans of SNES Bomberman might initially wrinkle their noses, but these Bombermen visibly react to the onscreen action. Trap yourself between two bombs, for instance, and your character is likely to start praying, panicking or digging his own grave. There's also a pleasing selection of different 'death animations' cued up, ready to unfold when you inevitably die - sometimes you'll lose an arm in the blast, sometimes your entire head. The more functional graphical aspects, such as the animated 'walking' sequences, are also impeccable. Pile a huge number of players onscreen and the frame rate drops significantly, although never so far as to render the game unplayable. And incidentally, real purists can always turn the new spangly bits off and play in lo-fi 'Classic' mode if they prefer.
Oh yeah, the multi-player option. Up to ten of you can battle it out at one time. Yes, ten. There's barely room to move, of course, but that's all part of the fun. To fully enjoy this gameplay mode, you'll need one of the following: 1) Ten Microsoft Sidewinder joypads, daisychained together and plugged into one huge, throbbing Demon Seed-style PC, or 2) a modem, a phone line and an Internet account for bombing the crap out of Americans and other Web lowlifes, or 3) your own local area network.
Options 1) and 3) offer the smoothest gameplay, but are the least practical. They're all screaming good fun, although playing free-for-alls in groups of six upwards can be rath confusing - not to mention frustrating when you're one of the first to die and can only contemplate your navel while the others finish the game. Using the new team play option is the best bet for big groups.
What else is there to say? Sound effects? Well, the constant stream of 'zany' vocal taunts has grown on us since last issue's preview. The Joe Pesci soundalike makes us laugh out loud (because we've been talking 'Pesci' non-stop ourselves, ever since we watched Casino). The Jim Carrey/Forrest Gump side of things is a little more annoying. Still, you have got the option of recording your own taunts, so the sky's the limit as far as bad language goes. See if you have it in you to visibly turn the air blue.
Light fuse and retire
So it's 90 per cent for Atomic Bomberman. It's undeniably addictive, and almost impossible to screw up. The recently-released Sega Saturn version is much better, although you can't play it over the Internet, and even if you could, you'd be hard-pressed to find a single other Saturn-owning sucker out there. But it does have cuter graphics, spanglier sound and a nice overall feel, so if you do have a Saturn, buy that version instead. Also, don't even consider parting with your cash if you're planning to play solely against the computer because the Al isn't brilliant. Still, those two gripes aside, you can purchase with confidence. Especially since it's cheap.
Boms and Songs
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Ever since mankind learnt to combine notes, words and rhythm in order to create 'songs', we've been inundated with explosives-related popular music stuff. Don't believe us? This is just the tip of the iceberg...
MR BOOM BAST IC - SHAGGY
Rasp-throated ragga opus featuring lyrics so nonsensical that a team of eight English professors with degrees in lingual rationalisation toiled for six years in a doomed attempt to fathom its meaning. Three were driven insane, one committed suicide, while the remaining four shaved their heads and formed a naked dance troupe called 'The Bottom Sailors'.
SONIC BOOM BOY - WESTWORLD
Dayglo power-pop from mid-'80s one-hit wonders. Their other stuff was 'quite dancey' says Jezza. 'A Republica before their time,' muses Wag. 'They were crap' interjects Spike, hitting the nail on the head.
THE FINAL COUNTDOWN - EUROPE
Apocalyptic epic from a band with absurdly large hair. They looked like they had fucking haystacks on their heads, for crying out loud.
BANG BANG - BA ROBERTSON
History of human conflict condensed into staccato bubblegum pop lyrics by bloke with Weird Al Yankovich haircut. A weirdy one-off.
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WE HAVE EXPLOSIVE - FUTURE SOUND OF LONDON
Industro-rave from the Cubase maestros. Sounds like an angry Dalek shouting 'we have explosive' over and over again, while a Cyberman tumbles down a flight of metal stairs and someone slams a car door in the background, though none of that was in the video, apparently.
ATOM BOMB - FLUKE'Baby's got an atom bomb,' they sang, all stupid and breathy and with a faux American accent. Still, could have been worse. Could have been Europe.
BOOM-BANC A BANC - LULU
Neither know nor care about this. About things blowing up, I suppose.
